101 Texts
by rapunzelleee
Summary: Post Reichenbach. Even though John knows that Sherlock's dead he still texts him all the time. But will he ever get a reply? Just some quick texts from John to Sherlock.


101 Texts

1) You died a week ago. Visiting your grave now. It's your funeral.

JW

2) Your grave is quite nice. Simple, but nice. You would like it.

JW

3) What? Why would you like your own grave?

JW

4) Ignore that last text

JW

5) A week and 3 days since you died. It's snowing. Funny though, because it's mid-summer

JW

6) Are you making it snow from, you know, above?

JW

7) What kind of question is that?

JW

8) Visited your grave again. Someone graphitised on it. Called the council. We're looking for the person who did it.

JW

9) Found the person who did it. Your so-called friend Raz did it as a mark of 'respect'. We're taking the matter to magistrate's court in two days.

JW

10) Oh, by the way, it's been a week and 4 days since you died. I'm counting the days.

JW

11) I'm doing it just if you come back.

JW

12) Is that sad?

JW

13) I've just asked Lestrade. It's sad.

JW

14) Lestrade's here by the way.

JW

15) He's helping me pack up.

JW

16) FYI, I'm packing up because I'm leaving London.

JW

17) Just for a bit.

JW

18) I'm staying with Harry until I get over the depression.

JW

19) That's depression over you by the way.

JW

20) It's nothing major but I need to get sorted out.

JW

21) You don't mind me leaving do you?

JW

22) Wait, why am I asking you this? You won't reply.

JW

23) I mean, you're dead.

JW

24) Or are you?

JW

25) You could be still out there.

JW

26) Somewhere.

JW

27) What the hell am I saying?

JW

28) OK. I'm very confused now!

JW

29) OK. I have determined that you are DEFINITELY dead now.

JW

30) Or are you?

JW

31) Sorry. I'll stop now.

JW

32) I have to go for now because Lestrade's probably just seen your shrunken head as he's screaming like a little girl!

JW

33) Yeah, I know, I've kept your shrunken head.

JW

34) And your skull.

JW

35) And your chemistry kits.

JW

36) I've REALLY got to go now. I think Lestrade has fainted.

JW

37) Hi. I'm just texting to say goodbye because I'm boarding the aeroplane and you're not allowed mobile phones. Also Harry's got no signal up in Scotland.

JW

38) She's staying in a castle.

JW

39) Its apparently haunted.

JW

40) But you wouldn't believe that would you?

JW

41) Security are practically ripping this phone out of my hands now so I'm going to say bye.

JW

42) I love you.

JW

43) Aah! Why did I just press send?

JW

44) Bye. See you in 2 months.

JW

45) Hi. I haven't texted in a while because I didn't have any signal.

JW

46) To be honest I kind of forgot about you.

JW

47) Don't be mad.

JW

48) I was busy with other things.

JW

49) Ooh, I can actually feel you glaring at me.

JW

50) You always hated me not telling you something.

JW

51) OK. I'll tell you. I met this wonderful girl called Mary on the plane.

JW

52) She actually lives a couple of streets away from us.

JW

53) Well, me.

JW

54) Oh god. Tears are welling up in my eyes now.

JW

55) Grr! I thought I had almost got over you!

JW

56) Sorry that last text was a bit harsh.

JW

57) I could never completely get over you.

JW

58) Wow! That was sickeningly sentimental.

JW

59) You would really hate me for saying that.

JW

60) Anyway, so me and Mary are going on another date tonight.

JW

61) We're going to the cinema

JW

62) I know, that's really bland and mundane.

JW

63) But Mary wanted to do something traditional.

JW

64) Well, kind of, traditional.

JW

65) I'll text you about what happened.

JW

68) Listen to me. I sound like a textaholic teenager.

JW

69) Bye, for now.

JW

70) Wow! Last night's date was almost perfect.

JW

71) ALMOST perfect.

JW

72) Because I thought I saw you.

JW

73) So I went chasing you, or whoever it was.

JW

74) I couldn't find anyone, so it wasn't you.

JW

75) I mean, you were with Molly! And you're really not interested in her!

JW

76) Sounding like a teenager again!

JW

77) Are you interested in her?

JW

78) Why do I keep asking you questions?

JW

79) You're DEAD!

JW

80) Or are you?

JW

81) GRR! I promised myself I wouldn't do this anymore!

JW

82) Mary's coming over to stay tonight.

JW

83) We've been out on a few dates and I've finally decided to ask her an important question.

JW

84) I'm going to ask her to marry me!

JW

85) Don't smirk!

JW

86) That is, if you were smirking.

JW

87) Knowing you, you probably were.

JW

88) Sorry! I didn't mean it to sound as mean as that!

JW

89) Will you forgive me?

JW

90) You're not answering so I'm going to take that as a no.

JW

91) Well, of course you're not answering!

JW

92) It kind of annoys me you know.

JW

93) How you never answer.

JW

94) I don't care if your dead you can still reply!

JW

95) I do care actually because I still really miss you.

JW

96) Oh, I should probably say: I'm going to stop texting you now.

JW

97) Mary and my therapist think it's a bit creepy how I'm always texting a dead man.

JW

98) Goodbye Sherlock. Goodbye.

JW

99) John? John?

SH

100) Are you there?

SH

101) Hello?


End file.
